A man was walking through paddy fields near his village one day on his way to his mother in law's house in the next village, when suddenly he felt the urge of needing the toilet. The fields were vastly covered in newly grown rice plants in a vibrant green colour, and they had reached up to about 30cm tall. The man was getting quite desperate, but he wasn't very confident he'll make it to their house in time. Even then, he'll have to run in without speaking to them straight into the toilet, which would be disrespectful.
The only solution was to shit in the field, which was very open but no one was around. He rolled up his lungi (sarong), and squatted, balancing on his two feet. The man shitted on the ground and then stood up. He looked around to see if anyone was around, but there wasn't anyone. Suddenly he looked down at a moving object on the ground, and to his amazement, it was his s**t which had formed legs and was jumping away from him! He felt very happy, and thought to himself, 'Wow, my s**t is is alive!'. His s**t then disappeared into the paddy fields and he carried on walking to his in law's village feeling very relieved and looking forward to the lovely food awaiting his arrival especially cooked by his caring mother in-law.
The man reached his mother in law's house and greeted her. She asked him to take a seat while she cooks something for him to eat. He obliged and sat on a chair, staring out of the window into the open fields.
His mother in law cooked a chicken curry for him, which he really enjoyed, then it was time to sleep, as it was getting late.
The man could feel something pushing, something trying to come out from his anus. He opened his eyes to see only the light from the lantern in the hall coming through the door which was ajar. The toilet was outside of the house, so he did not even consider going out in the dark at 2 O'clock in the morning. He was getting desperate so he thought about what happened earlier in the fields, where his s**t came alive and jumped away. If he has another s**t anywhere, it will form legs and just jump away, hence he won't need to use the toilet outside! He smiled as he thought about it and pulled his lungi up again, and squatted to do the honour in the bedroom.
After he finished doing the business, he looked at the hot steamy s**t that was resting in the middle of the bedroom. Telling the s**t to form legs once again and jump away, the man started to lightly push it with a leaf he found in the window sill. Nothing happened. The s**t would not form legs, and would not jump or walk away like it did in the fields earlier that day.
He thought to himself he now has to take drastic action. Looking around the room, he found a broomstick which he could use to 'shoo' the ugly looking slimy object away. The bedroom was still quite dark, as the man did not open the door any more than it was open already. He got very angry so he started to smack the s**t with the broomstick, hitting it harder and harder each time. Finally the s**t had disappeared which meant he could sleep in peace.
In the morning the man was still asleep because he was tired after the little enoucnter with the un-cooperative s**t that did not shift. His mother in law came into the room to wake him up when suddenly she got a smack in the face from a disgusting wiff of s**t and realised the room was totally covered in splattered s**t everywhere! She knew who was responsible, so she grabbed the broomstick the man used to smack the s**t with the night before, and thumped him on his head! The dried s**t off the broomstick broke into smaller pieces as it had dried and became solid, as she kept thumping him, while he grabbed his lungi and ran out of the house! His mother in law screamed at him, 'Don't you dare even think about coming here again, you DIRTY bastard!'